Piss

I have owned cats for nearly 50 years, and I would like to say that cat piss is the most deadly weapon in the world.

It can destroy your house, your marriage, your oriental rugs, and your friendships.

In fact, I would strongly suggest that we gather all the leaders of the world, all the terrorists, every enemy of peace everywhere, and equip them with back pack cylinders filled with cat piss and equipped with sprayers. Then we lock them in some airtight space and have them spray it out.  I would guarantee that within two hours, they would all be begging for release and would have signed, in blood, a peace agreement that would stand the test of time.

I currently have five cats, and they all piss only in the litter box.  I regard this as a miracle and thank god or whoever is in charge of the general chaos every single day.

I have had two rogue pissers in my lifetime.  You try everything.  You buy every known deoderizer and odor remover in the world.  Ultimately though, you have to make that tragic trip to the vet’s office and say goodbye.

I had a beautiful rug once.  It had been irrevocably damaged by cat piss.  I was ready to put it in the dumpster, but my husband rolled it up and put it by the curb.  “Nobody’s going to pick that up,” I insisted.  “We’ll see,” he quietly replied.

The next morning it was gone.  I have always pictured the unsuspecting man who threw it in the back of his pickup and took it home, thinking his wife would be so pleased.

I can see him taking it inside, proudly unrolling it for her and saying, ” Honey, look what I……..

God bless kitties!

 

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