I

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This is me, three years ago, visiting some dear friends in England.  Lest you think I am some travel maven that flits from country to country and lives a life of soirees, pâté and chilled champagne,

Let me add that it was my only trip ever out of the U.S, and that it took several weeks of therapy and two xanax to even get me to the airport.

I am a homebody. So is my husband. And we also have a lazy standard poodle, and five cats. No, my house does not smell of cat pee.

I write.  Have always done so.  Poems, brochures, song lyrics, speeches ( for the chancellor of a state university), company magazines.  It has been my soul, and for many years, my sole employment.

I am nearly 74 years old. I need to repeat that in order for it to be real to me: On April 18,2016, I will be 74.  That just can’t be right.  And yet, there it is.

I object.

I havent done it all yet

I am just getting the hang of this

I never imagined I would age.  Nobody ever does.  I look in the mirror sometimes when I’m washing my face.

I say, “Who the fuck are You?

I, it is I.

I will continue to be me

Because

I……

7 thoughts on “I

  1. Dearest Linda,
    I’ve had one cocktail and a glass of wine with cheese, crackers and summer sausage…my dinner. So, I shouldn’t be reading and writing. I understand how you feel. Me neither! I’m not nearly through either….but the calendar just keeps fucking going on and on!

    My brother died last week, as you know, and he’s the first of the five of us. I’m supposing I will watch through the other two deaths…if we go nearly in order? I’m the fourth of five. I don’t care for this at all! I don’t “feel” like an old lady of 69….no, I don’t!

    I asked myself….just about five minutes ago….”How the Hell long will this last?” This question, as I filled my glass, walking from the bar to the living room, to watch another episode of Balltkissangel, a British episode my friend downloaded for me. I’ve been “solo” as the Ecuadoreans say, for 15 months now….and I keep feeling like it should end soon…..ill get over it, like the flu!!

  2. Lovely post, thank you. In the picture, you look a bit surprised to have found yourself overseas. 🙂 I’m a homebody, too, although I drag my family overseas every four or five years (Europe was once home). But … it’s always nice to be back to where everything is easy and familiar.

  3. Great post Linda, my mother is little younger but as I read your words its just like hearing her saying the same thing… I’ll write the same what I tell her: You’re as old/young as you feel, age is just a number 🙂

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